Some still struggle with saying yes or no when they mean it. When I was younger, the elderly taught me you “say what you mean, and mean what you say.” During those years, this principle sounded easy to say than to apply. I was a little shy, so it was easier to please others than cause discord. As an adult, on my peaceful journey, I am learning more about the importance of assertiveness. My dependency on the approval and validation from others is no longer a controlling factor. I try to honor my truth and live in authenticity. While I may fall short, this is my aim.
Subsequently, after listening to others complain about the expectations placed on them from others and hearing their complaints regarding things they have agreed to do for others. Their complaint is they wish they had said “no” instead of saying “yes.” Oftentimes, I find too much time is spent complaining about lending a shoulder to others, a listening ear, or allowing oneself to become accessible to others against one’s will.
Well, why complain if you’re finding yourself doing for others because you’re kind enough to help? Do it without complaining. If you’re assisting others out of a sense of obligation or fear of rejection if you do not, then don’t. Say “no,” if you can’t or your heart isn’t in it. Say “yes” if want to assist. You may find yourself helping others you allow your good deeds to go as far as you will.
Have you thought about why you’re the one others freely come to? Have you considered why they’re not asking others? The reason is possible you may be their only yes.
When the power of saying yes and no is learned, then we learn the power in becoming true to ourselves. We learn the power in saying “yes and no” should come from a place of sincerity and purity. When, we’re not saying “yes or no” begrudgingly, then our heart is not misleading.
At times, when communicating with others, we must be assertive and take a firm stand. This is not rudeness. It is using good judgment. A “yes” at the wrong time can be detrimental to all involved. The same goes to saying “no”. Handling things right prevents us from experiencing an unsettling about our actions and becoming resentful.
Take the time to see the value of honoring your truth. More than likely, you’ll find you’re saying “yes or no”often as before, but you experience empowerment when you do not go against your freewill.